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R.B. Ruins The Show

A story by Lovejoy J. Lovejoy


BLACKWOOD: Anything going on in there?

'I don't drink because I like to stay in control' Richard Blackwood recently told The Daily Mirror. There he is again then, adding to my already sizable degree of contempt for him, and all moon-cat-eyed bufoonery. I mean, for God's sake, if I had a comedy routine as poor as the one he's been peddaling, I wouldn't be able to mount the stage without first having embarked on a treacherously long sojourn to local gin shop.

Confirmed bachelor, Blackwood, veteran of BBC 2's short-lived and characteristically cruel comedy sketch show 'The Real McCoy', last year turned his dull eyes to the musical world; despite blurting to Craig David on MTV, in early 2000, that he has absolutely no musical talent. Much like his half sister Naomi Campbell, he wasn't going to let this stand in his way.

But, boy, did he bring that homegrown style of limp commentary and unbridled self-promotion to the forum yet again.

His excellent music/comedy turn 'Get with the wicked' (yes, it did sound so urban and fresh) contained the following vocal hook: 'Who's the man, baby?' Which he 'rapped' in his trademark cool, yet hoarse-and-lifeless, fashion.

The phrase 'Who's the man, baby?' was not only his MTV catchphrase but also something of a safety net, for Richard. If someone says something he doesn't understand, he drags it out again: 'Who's the man, baby?' To whit, some very tired cameraman would respond 'You are'. And then he'd beam.

Last month, Mr. Blackwood was dropped by his record label.